Suicidal Baby

Dearest Laurel,

You have a thousand toys, all of which are strewn around the room.  You have blocks, balls, dolls, stuffed animals, teething toys, learning toys, toys that beep, toys that talk.  Why, then, do you insist on finding newer, more dangerous things to play with?

I know that the outlets look like little faces with their mouths open, but you don’t need to try to feed them your fingers.  I am aware that the Direct TV box has a touch screen;  and it’s really cool that when you touch the front of it, the TV turns off.  I totally get that the cat tree looks like the best jungle gym around.   Those, I understand.

What I don’t get is why you insist on grabbing the cords of the keyboard, mouse, and baby monitor and pulling them down on your head.  I’m all for you learning cause and effect…but when do you think you’ll learn them?  Because this is the fifth time today that you’re crying because you pulled the damn keyboard down and it landed on your foot.

Hoping you don’t give yourself brain damage before you learn your lesson,

Momma

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